Dis...

I am still 15 lbs. heavier than I want to be, even though my eating has been near immaculate, my exercise near Olympian. I accept what my body has done and what it can do. I just hate to see that whatsherface has yet to reclaim her derriere and replace my proportional one back where it belongs.

I don't have the energy to truly focus on a diet that will guarantee a slimmer Kendra by summer's end.

I don't have the bandwidth here to capacitate a more formal, abysmally boring discussion of diets in general.

What I do have is this:

Today I pointed to this picture that is in our hallway. Lovey Loverpants looks like a bouncer for a Mafia bar (but dead handsome, no?) and I look half-baked (my allergies were horrible that week!).

Who's that? I asked.

Baby Girl points to Loverpants, "Dis dis Daddy."

Baby Girl points to Mama, "Dis dis Mama Mine," and pulls her greedy hands to her chest on "mine."

I could die fat, but I would die happy.

Knock Knock

Knock kno------wait. You're inside and I'm outside. Why are YOU the one knocking?

Oh fine.

WHO'S THEEEYERRRRR?

Why! It's my wedding dress crying for me to clean it. It's only been sitting there for four years. Hey, wait, what's that pushing out beside that --

Why it's the Great Peanut Butter Faced Avenger!!!

Said she could live in there if we just keep spooning peanut butter through the door....