Once, Twice, Dozens

I pulled out onto our busy road today, riding the motorino, rocking my hot pink fleece cuffs that my mother-in-law made for me, when I look to see in my rearview mirror a whole fleet of motorcyclists. What did that look like? I wondered. A pint-sized rogue on a scooter rocking the ladybug helmet, leading a fleet of Hell's Angels through the country roads of East Tennessee. "This way, boys! Y'all ever been to a Sonic? I just love their Cherry Limeade! What's more, we'll get there in time for happy hour!" ***

A friend recently told me Pasty Cline recorded "Crazy" in one take. I verified with NPR. Incredible. To deliver the most requested jukebox hit in the history of jukebox hits with one shot at the big leagues. That song is so raw, and it is not a simple song both in emotion and arrangement. I'm in awe.

Patsy Cline was 31 when she died in an airplane crash.

Oh. hah. I'm 31. I haven't recorded my "Crazy" yet. I suppose I've been busy. Leading Hell's Angels down country roads.

***

While fiddling on the compooper tonight, I was watching "Groundhog Day" in the background. The character of Bill Murray is egocentric, his "defining characteristic" says Andie MacDowell's character. He's given dozens of tries to get it right, to step outside his own self-serving needs to understand the root of joy is helping others.

I'm more "Groundhog Day" than I am "Crazy," is what I know for sure.

I'm also glad I wake up singing "I've Got You Babe" than "I Fall to Pieces..." or else I'd be in a really bad way. Maybe even riding caboose to Hell's Angels.

***

Brief, Sweet, Important

The hairdresser said she was always happy to see me. She told me this today, before I had even had a proper blow-out.

She said with a sincere smile, "I'm always happy to see you."

I am a church worker. Trust, I am not her best tipper.

Plus, I've only been a client for less than a year.

She said she was always. Happy.

Always happy to see.

To see me.

It made my day.

Because, you know me.

I'm Irish, I drip with sarcasm.

I love hard, feel hard, and dismiss it all with a laugh and a gag.

I find it difficult to tell people who mean a lot to me that I'm always happy to see them.

I find it difficult to use the words "happy" and "always" and "see" in a sentence.

There's a liability there.

What if the person comes to let you down, and you're no longer happy, you no longer want to see her?

What if there might come a time when you can't see her?

Does that mean you won't be happy anymore?

That's the part that scares me.

I stepped out of that fear today, though.

I want to thank Meg You-Know-Who-You-Are of Hair-a-Go-Go who's always happy to see me.

She put her happy and always and see in a sentence.

She gave it to me without expectation.

And she gave me a killer set of highlights.

Then she left to go pick up her son at daycare because he had a fever.

I left looking better.

Feeling better.

Inside and out.

But really.

Let's be honest.

How could anyone NOT be happy to see ME?

Always.

Tennessee

The Tennessee sky is high and soft, not like Colorado's which feels close, or wide cast over cornfields as in Ohio. The stars are visible and sometimes powerfully bright; not like the faint constellations over Boston. Tennessee roads are hilly and marked by hairpin turns that are impolite. The yards and acreage are beautiful and often shaggy, not as manicured as the horse farms to the north in Kentucky. Tennessee drivers are cautious, they brake at the first smell of a threat, and to beep is to be downright rude.

Tennessee fruits are abundant, the flowers are surprisingly vibrant and full even though they must abide weeks of dryness.

Tennessee loves its Wal-Marts, tractors, barbecue, guns. Tennessee loves Protestant church. Tennessee's Christian radio scene is first rate.

Tennessee still uses AOL e-mail addresses. Tennessee mostly calls, rather than texts.

Tennesseeans, being inland, will ferret out a swimming hole with a thirst like soldiers seeing a woman after having been entrenched for months.

Tennessee is some of the best of America, beautiful and complicated.

Tennessee is my home of one year.